I matter.

I matter.

You matter.

At IMMERSE last week, we discussed the importance of knowing that regardless of your past, In God’s eyes, YOU MATTER. He doesn’t keep a tally mark of your mistakes, he loves you no more and no less than he did when you made those mistakes. No one has made enough mistakes, big or small, that would cause Him to not want a beautiful life for you.

Someone once used the analogy “if you are always looking in the rearview mirror, you will have an accident”. Memories play such a huge role in our lives that it can be a daily challenge, at least for me, to not dwell on the past. The past you know, you lived it, you remember it, it is right there at the forefront of your mind. The future, you don’t know, you can’t see and you can’t predict it.  We are creatures of holding on to what we know and not always believing in what we don’t know.

I hold on to feelings. I hold on to knowing what made me happy, what made me sad, angry, hurt, excited, loved, etc. I want to be able to replicate all those good feelings with someone new and not necessarily a boy. I want to replicate happy feelings with friends, family AND potentially meeting someone who makes me feel the way my last relationship did.

I want to stop looking in the rearview mirror, thinking “well that made me happy then, just go back to that comfort zone, because you probably won’t find anything better”

1.       I matter. What I want in life matters. Who I am matters. I deserve a beautiful life with a wonderful companion that I do not settle for.

2.       Letting go of that “comfort zone” is just part of the process. I am not unique in the fact that it is so challenging, I know most people struggle with the loss of any great relationship, but I should be excited about the idea that I have no idea the kind of person God has in his plan for me next.

3.       Stop dwelling and know that I do deserve to find that happiness again and have faith, oh so much faith, that I will find it.

Girls especially have a habit of thinking they only deserve a certain level of things in life. We think that because of our pasts, because of our insecurities, we don’t deserve the things that we see other people have. “Oh, she’s such a great girl and look at her wonderful life, job, husband, boyfriend, she deserves that.”

 Me – “I know I won’t ever have things that great since I am not that great, but I will hopefully find someone, have a job, and have a life that is just “good enough”

NO! NO! NO!

I matter.

I deserve the best companion imaginable and the best out of life – always.

Five Truths:

1.       Ran the Hot Chocolate 10K last weekend in the POURING rain – but I finished! J It is the furthest I have ever run! ½ marathon T-minus 3 weeks!

2.       I am obsessed with the t.v. series Breaking Bad. LOVE.

3.       I have gotten off track a little this past week on my devotions and time with myself and God. It actually makes me feel sad! Jumping back on this week!

4.       I am not sure getting back on facebook was the best idea…….

5.       Made some new friends this weekend and it was fabulous!! J